What If Your Loved One Doesn’t Want a Traditional Funeral Service

Ideally, services and the final disposition of the body can be planned in advance. This allows the loved one to offer input and even help with arrangements. Most of the time, elderly or ill people are happy to help their families and friends with this final task. It’s always easier when an individual can tell others what he or she expects for a service, burial, or cremation. Of course, it’s possible to solicit the opinions of other close family members and friends at that time.

In some cases, people have strong opinions about their service or how their remains will be handled after their death. These beliefs might even come in conflict with the way that traditional funerals have been done in the past. Typically, a traditional type of funeral service occurs before the remains are buried or cremated. These days, more and more people are opting for an immediate cremation. This is true even if they plan to have a memorial service at a later date.

There are many reasons why an individual may not want to have a funeral service held for them after they pass away:

  • They may have concerns that the cost will put a financial burden on their family.
  • In other cases, they may just have beliefs about the right way to dispose of and honor their body due to having certain feelings about spiritual matters or the environment.

When this kind of final request conflicts with strong feelings that you or other family members have, it’s a very difficult problem to solve. Best case scenario, you might find a compromise while your loved one is still living. For instance, you might arrange a direct cremation with a simple memorial service later.

If friends or family members prefer, you can invite a member of the clergy to lead a service like this, even if it’s not a traditional funeral. This should follow the spirit of their request, even if it wasn’t exactly what you think they had in mind.

Whose Opinion About Services Matters the Most?

There’s not one right or wrong answer about which requests should be honored after a loved one dies. You might put more weight upon the departed person’s desires. In the long run, you’ll know that you honored them by advocating for their final wishes. However, if this choice gives some survivors a lot of pain, you may consider a compromise. Honoring survivors is also part of honoring a departed loved one.

Preplanning all of the cremation or funeral details can avoid a lot of these problems, but that’s not always possible. Ideally, the solutions you choose will honor your departed friend’s or family member’s life while also being sensitive to those who were close to the deceased. If the departed person entrusted you to carry out their final wishes, you should also take heart in the fact that they trusted you to do the right thing. Contact Boston Cremation today by calling 781.322.0909 to learn more about options available to you for a loved one’s memorial.

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