Paul G. Lupinacci

Paul G. Lupinacci, 62, of Burlington, MA and Morris, CT passed away on April 28 after a sudden and brief battle with neuroendocrine cancer. He is survived by his beloved partner of 16 years, Ina Rothenbuecher of Burlington, MA, his brother Steven and wife Vickie of San Juan Capistrano, CA, nephew Adam and wife Amanda and children Jeremy and Olivia of Novato, CA, niece Kate and husband Matt Galati of Portland, OR, niece Emily and husband Vadim Kharaz of Conshohocken, PA, niece Julia of San Juan Capistrano, CA, many cousins, and many devoted friends.

Son of the late Alfred Lupinacci and late Gertrude (Arrigoni) Lupinacci, Paul was born in Bridgeport CT in 1955 and grew up in Darien. He graduated from Darien High School in 1973 and received his bachelor’s degree in accounting from Rollins College in 1977. Throughout his career, he held various accounting and risk management positions.

An avid boater, both with his personal flotilla of watercraft, as well as through his 100-ton Master Captain’s license, Paul was always happiest on the water. He was an accomplished water and snow skier as well.

The lives of everyone he touched were made better by his larger than life personality. His generous nature and love of life will be remembered and missed by all.

Per Paul’s request there will be no immediate memorial service. In lieu of flowers, donations in his memory may be made to his beloved Bantam Lake via either Bantam Lake Protective Association ( or Bantam Lake Ski Club (

To leave a condolence or share a memory, please click below.


Let the family know you care by sharing this tribute.

31 Condolences

  1. bruce losee on May 2, 2017 at 6:31 pm

    To all Ina and the Lupinacci family please know that all of his friends here in Litchfield will miss Lupo terribly…our prayers and thoughts go out to you all … we will especially miss his presence at Road Race where he was a fixture on the course…

    Bruce & Suvi Losee

  2. Scott Pottbecker on May 2, 2017 at 6:50 pm

    To all,

    It is hard to imagine Bantam Lake ever being the same without Lupo. Paul touched the lives of so many people in such a positive way whether it was teaching someone to ski or just offering a helping hand. Our prayers and thoughts go out to all, as we work through this difficult time.

    The Pottbecker Family – Scott, Amy, Kayla, Colin, Taylor and Sage

  3. Dave Davidian on May 2, 2017 at 7:11 pm

    To All,
    My prayers and thoughts go out to Ina, the Lupinacci family and all who loved and met Lupo. Anyone who had met Lupo was affected by him in the best way, including me. I am proud to call him friend, and to me he was like family. I loved snow skiing with him, even though he never thought I could ski, or keep up with him and he reminded me of this all the time (typical Lupo). Don’t worry I used to bust on him about a few things. I will also miss meeting him for a drink in Greenwich, Ct., he always had me giggling. Such a great person that I will truly miss.

  4. Robert LaBonne Jr. on May 2, 2017 at 7:12 pm

    Paul, you took Bantam Lake by storm over 40 years ago. The lake and all who you touched are now better off for having been blessed by your presence. The memories you created will never fade just as your zest for life, friendships and good times made our lake a special place that we all wanted to come home to. Our thoughts and prayers go out to Ina and your entire Lupinacci family.

    Bob, Shelley and the entire LaBonne family

  5. Louise Arnold on May 2, 2017 at 7:40 pm

    To Ina and family, my thoughts and prayers go out to you. Loved seeing you and Lupo here at the village. We will miss him!

    Louise Arnold

  6. Gary Stafford on May 2, 2017 at 8:39 pm

    Big Dog Calling Rubber Duck Big Dog Calling Rubber Duck Big Dog Calling Rubber Duck Negative Contact Rubber Duck Is Off The Air But Never Forgotten Big Dog Out

  7. Dave Pugliese and Family on May 2, 2017 at 8:45 pm

    For the last 39 years the Lupinacci family has been our next door neighbor on Deer Island and we allways enjoyed watching Paul or his many guests come and go from his mini marina , there were many night’s at the ” Tiki Bar ” and the next day my Father Charlie would comment to me that is was a good night judging by the music or how many trips he heard being made to the recycle bin with all the empty bottles the next morning , every one knows that is what Paul really enjoyed , ” I had fun once ” was one of his favorite toasts and he is a true friend that we all will miss ……….

  8. Sharon Rosenberg, Connie Trolle on May 2, 2017 at 9:00 pm

    It was always all about Paul. He made everything better. He made everything fun. He made us all remember to enjoy life as he did. He is and will be always be around us as we struggle through. Never to be replaced or forgotten. Our thoughts and prayers to you Ina, Vicki, Steve and the next two generations. With our love, Connie and Sharon

  9. Denise and Greg Raap on May 2, 2017 at 9:08 pm

    We will miss seeing Paul and Ina at the Village. I loved having a good hearted back and forth with Paul through out the years. I met him
    Years ago when he left his credit card behind at the Village, I didn’t know who he was but i just loved pronouncing his last name LU-PAN-ACCI He was a bright light in our lives So sad he left us so soon. Much love Denise and Greg Raap

  10. Elizabeth & Tom Dowd on May 2, 2017 at 9:24 pm

    Our hearts are broken. You were as generous as you were fun. We will always remember you:

    Out on the lake on a beautiful day
    Skiing back home through the dusk
    Gathering friends on the patio deck
    Loading your boat like a bus

    I don’t think you knew
    how we all looked to you
    Creating such joy on demand
    No matter how much you
    prepared for your friends
    Somehow it never seemed planned

    We all have our tales of beloved excess
    Capers gone wrong from the start
    Yet in recounting stories in subsequent days
    The mess was the very best part

    You fought the devil and beat it two times
    Scarred, but unbent by the strife
    It’s unfair to expect one always to win
    Even you, bigger than life

    So we stand on the shore with our
    Thoughts and our grief
    Goodbyes and attachments unsaid
    Yet may fate and mercy return you Your share
    of the pure happiness that you spread

    Love you, man. Good rest.

  11. Lance on May 2, 2017 at 10:23 pm

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lupo ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Paul was at his best behind the wheel or hanging on for dear life behind the boat. How we survived high school and our college years is anyone’s guess – but we sure had fun. I remember learning to barefoot based on 16mm films we saw at the Bantam Ski Club – damn that hurt. There are so many memories – from a high school road trip to Disney World (just after it opened) to sailing through the BVI celebrating our 50’th – Lupo made it all something to remember. Just like a Disney ride, Paul was animated, exciting and over too soon.

    Our thoughts go out to Ina and his brother Steve. We wish you well.

    Lupo, you’ll be missed by all you touched but never forgotten.
    Lance & Janette Murphy

  12. Monica Doyle on May 2, 2017 at 10:54 pm

    Captain, my sweet friend, you were one of the first people I met when I moved up to Bantam Lake in 1982 with Dickie. What an impression you made on me. Your place was where we had the best and most memorable times. On the weekends when all the tourists were cutting up the water we would all just tie our boats together and float and party (sponge fights too). During the week when the water was like glass we would all be out skiing. I remember our floats up the “Bantam River”. Then the time we took all the boats down to the ocean for a beautiful outing. Winter never stopped us when we used to cut the hole in the ice and jump in then hit the hot tub quickly. How did your dad Fred tolerate us? My friend… I have some wonderful memories that will live in my heart forever. Ina, Steve and family my prayers go out to you in this time of sadness and loss. He was the best…

  13. Susan and Rick O'Dell on May 3, 2017 at 1:07 am

    We’re so saddened to hear about Paul. Our deepest condolences to you all.

  14. Leslie and Sarah on May 3, 2017 at 1:27 am

    To Ina and family.
    It was with great sadness that We have learned of Paul’s passing. Please accept our heartfelt condolences. And that we will sadly miss his smiling face and cheerfulness. Us girls at jackies always loved to see him come in he always brought happiness with him. Prayers for all of you.
    Leslie and Sarah (jackies restaurant)

  15. Cristina Mehrtens on May 3, 2017 at 12:53 pm

    My daughters and I are extremely touched by missing the presence of this good friend. Michael loved him like a brother and I am sure that they are somewhere/when/what together now. My heart and prayers with you, Ina, and his family.

  16. Barb Wood on May 3, 2017 at 12:58 pm

    To Ina and all of Paul’s family and friends, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. Paul lit up a room with his sweet smile and charm. His Killington Grand family will miss him terribly. Winter weekends won’t be the same here.

    My heart aches to know he is gone. I wish his Ina, his family friends lots of strength during this difficult time.

    Barb Wood and the Killington Grand Family

  17. Priscilla Loomis on May 3, 2017 at 2:18 pm

    Ina, Steve and Vicki – We were saddened to hear of Paul’s passing. You are all in our thoughts and prayers.
    I remember when Paul and Steve arrived on the lake like it was yesterday. So many memories. Bantam Lake will never be the same. He may be gone but he will never be forgotten.
    The Loomis Family – Priscilla, Lance, Cameron and Colton

  18. Maria Stafford on May 3, 2017 at 3:07 pm

    Paul, you have left an everlasting impression on all of us. I and the” Christmas Club Crew” , have “Limoed” with the Best!!

  19. Kathy, Chris, Kelly & Sammi Hill on May 3, 2017 at 5:17 pm

    To Ina and all the Lupinacci family – we wish you peace and send you prayers to help you through this enormous loss.
    Paul was the first person I met when I moved to Bantam Lake by myself 24 years ago and rented Uncle Charlie Lupinacci’s apartment across the cove. He pulled up on the beach in the inflatable boat one night and said “hi”. He welcomed me into this lovely community, helped me make new friends and showed me how to truly have fun.
    Paul, your bright spirit brought us laughter and made us all kids again. We will miss that rubber duck cruising by the window.

  20. The Lauretano Family on May 3, 2017 at 5:36 pm

    Our thoughts and prayers to Ina, and all of Lupo’s family and friends. He was a presence on Bantam Lake that will forever live on in our memories. He was a friend and a mentor to many of us “young folks” as he encouraged us to become leaders ourselves. He was an example of living in the moment and loving life. You are very missed Lupo!

    Crissie, Mike, Olivia, Ryan and Alexa

  21. Dave and Keith on May 3, 2017 at 7:38 pm

    We did have our annual snowmobile trip in mid February this year to The Forks in Maine with Paul and Ina , it was a lot of fun as usual and Paul did his daily planning for our trail routes and where we would stop for lunch and dinner , one of his routes led us all the way to the top of Colburn Mountain at an elevation of over 3000 ft , snowmobiling was just another one of the things he really enjoyed and we will miss not having him as our leader , a true friend to both of us and he will never be forgotten …….

  22. Grace Crowder on May 3, 2017 at 9:51 pm

    To Ina and Lupinacci family. What an amazing person and what a remarkable life. I feel so lucky that I got to know him and work for him. Paul will always be missed and love.I know this must be a very difficult and demanding time for you all. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. If there is anything I can do please let us know.

  23. Kim MacDonald on May 3, 2017 at 11:09 pm

    Ina, Steve, Vickie and Family…
    For 40 years, we have been so fortunate to know and love Paul and it is just so difficult to think of Bantam Lake without his presence…that laugh with the look….his magnetic smile…shenanigans throughout the years, Dock and Dine, dinners at Fred’s, long conversations, skiing, skiing and more skiing. We will miss him terribly and send you our most heartfelt sympathies….and endless hugs…
    The MacDonald Family

  24. Roger Smith & family on May 4, 2017 at 12:46 pm

    To all the Lupinacci family, please accept my deepest sympathies and condolences for your loss. My rememberances of Paul go way back to his early days in Darien – I do remember he was happiest with a camera in his hands or water ski’s on his feet. A loss for us all. Our prayers go out to his family and friends.. A loss for everyone who knew him

  25. Thomas Walsh on May 4, 2017 at 3:39 pm

    Life will never be the same without him. Rarely have I found a friend I looked so forward to seeing. After a winter away Paul was the one I most looked forward to seeing upon coming back to the lake. We would always pick up where we left off the season before. I have never met a more generous and kind person. Always concerned for happiness of others. Time spent with Paul was an oasis in life very difficult to find. I always looked forward to our time together, on the lake, at the tiki, out to dinner, snow skiing, “marine class”, conversations well into the evening, roughing it under the patio heaters, the list goes on and on. Paul could always be counted on for making life better with him than anywhere else. I think Paul felt that everyday was a gift and intended to live his life as such. I was fortunate enough to have been gifted quite a few of them, but I wish I could have just one more of them with him.

    I miss you my friend

  26. Noel T Fisher on May 4, 2017 at 7:40 pm

    My thoughts go out to In a and all his family
    I have only known Lipo for a few years but what a friend he became so up beat and always happy
    When ever I met him it an exuberant Hey Noel , I will miss that for the rest of my of my life
    I loved Lupo , what a true person and human being

  27. Mibs and Susan on May 4, 2017 at 11:33 pm

    Dear Ina, Steve, Vickie and family,
    Our lives were touched by this amazing force of life, which was Paul. His kindness, generosity and hospitality always made us feel happy to be around him. We will always remember him. Our thoughts and hearts are with you at this sad time. We wish you peace and comfort,

  28. Debbie Searer on May 5, 2017 at 12:37 pm

    So very sorry for your loss. My favorite memories of Darien have Steve and Paul in them! Prayers for all lifted from Mississippi.

  29. Matt and Linda Smith on May 5, 2017 at 11:01 pm

    To make a difference in the life of someone else is a life well lived. May Paul always live on in the memories of your adventures together.

    You are all in our love, thoughts and prayers.

    Matt and Linda

  30. Kathy Murphy Brooks on May 6, 2017 at 5:03 pm

    My deepest condolences to Ina, Steve and all of Paul’s family and friends on your loss. I will always remember Paul’s sense of joy and energy. Before there was the house on Bantam Lake, there were summers on Long Island Sound–Paul and the boys water-skiing and us girls Sun-fishing. Paul, of course, skiing dangerously close to us, laughing as the spray from his ski and the wake from the boat drenched us! Day trips in the winter, traveling north at dangerously high rates of speed just so we could be the first ones to hit the slopes. He was a patient teacher both on the water and on the snow, always making you believe you could do better. I’m glad he kept that sense of joy throughout his life and I am thankful to have known him growing up.

  31. Mark , Susan and family -Lupinaccci on May 27, 2017 at 10:39 am

    To Steve, Vicki, the kids and especially Ina:
    Our hearts go out to you at this time of loss. We are shocked and saddened by Paul’s passing. He will be missed.
    We were thankful for Paul’s help numerous times on ideas for boats, floats, docks, etc. He was a wealth of information on all things that had to do with the water and he seemed to love it.
    We were particularly thankful for Paul’s attention to Charlie the last few years of his life. It gave us comfort to know that Paul was near by keeping an eye on Charlie.
    Often I would look over and see Paul working on his fleet of boats , adjusting, maintaining, etc. Then a few minutes later he would be adjusting something on our dock. I would see Paul out with his Tiki bar (in all 4 seasons). He was a free spirit and will be sorely missed.

Leave a Condolence